I am moving house again. Unwillingly, for the first time ever. My landlord wants to fix all the leaks and cracks and damp and then live there, so we must once again decamp. For the first time ever, I am forced to relocate, and what was once a joyous leap into the realm of packing and unpacking has become a hellscape of horror.
我又要搬家了。 不情得地，有史以来第一次。 我的房东想修复所有的漏水、裂缝和潮湿，然后住在那里，所以我们必须再次退居。 有史以来第一次，我被迫搬迁，曾经欢快地跃入打包和拆包的领域，变成了恐怖的地狱。
The relics of our past, once revered and honoured, have become nothing more than bin fodder.
我们过去的遗迹，曾经受到尊敬和尊敬，现在只不过是垃圾饲料。
We shall keep our passports, photos and essential documents. Everything else is off to the wily world of trash busters, who shall soon be swanning around our new compound in the finest fashion.
我们将保留我们的护照、照片和基本文件。 其他一切都交给了狡猾的垃圾破坏者世界，他们很快就会以最好的方式在我们的新大院里游走。
Who even am I? Where has my joy for moving gone? Like all else in life, perspective is key.
我到底是谁？ 我搬家的喜悦到哪里去了？ 和生活中的其他一切一样，视角是关键。
Sometimes I feel like every word I think, and write, is an arrow into the darkness of the self, trying, in vain, to make some sense of it. The self, a unique identity that makes us essential beings; is bright, beautiful and brilliant. But not all of us feel this way about ourselves every moment of every day. And that, my friends, is down to perception, the way in which we understand ourselves and others. Although we may like to believe that our perceptions are unsullied, and in some sense, objectively true; inherited traits, mindsets and values are pretty much a lottery. I, for example, am witty, apparently.
有时我觉得我想和写的每一个字都是指向自我黑暗的箭，徒劳地试图理解它。 自我，一个独特的身份，使我们成为不可或缺的存在；明亮、美丽和辉煌。 但我们并不是所有人都对自己有这种感觉。 我的朋友，这归结于感知，我们理解自己和他人的方式。 虽然我们可能愿意相信，我们的感知是没有被吸取的，从某种意义上说，客观上是真实的；但继承的特质、心态和价值观几乎是彩票。 例如，我显然很机智。
People tend to equate that with confidence. But their perception of me has very little to do with how I perceive myself. Self perception is often at odds with that of the world at large.
人们倾向于将它等同于自信。 但他们对我的看法与我如何看待自己没有什么关系。 自我认知往往与整个世界的自我认知相悖。
Any written text is a prime example of the gap between how we feel ourselves to be, on an essential level, and the way others interpret our behaviour.
任何书面文本都是我们在基本层面上感受自己的方式与他人解释我们行为的方式之间的差距的典型例子。
According to Keith Oatley, Professor Emeritus of Cognitive Psychology at the University of Toronto, a text is not autonomous. When we read this text, or any text, we mentally rewrite our own version, complete with our own assumptions, perspectives and perceptions of the world and its consequent implications.
多伦多大学认知心理学名誉教授Keith Oatley表示，文本不是自主的。 当我们阅读本文或任何文本时，我们在精神上重写我们自己的版本，包括我们自己对世界的假设、观点和感知以及随之而来的含义。
This makes sense, we are all different humans, even identical twins can be said to grow up in entirely different families depending on intrinsic personality traits. I know that my three brothers consider me to be an alien, and in fairness, I didn’t witness their births, so who’s to say they weren’t foraged in the cabbage patch or dropped by the stork, despite my parents’ best efforts to scare it away?
这是有道理的，我们都是不同的人，即使是同卵双胞胎也可以说在完全不同的家庭中成长，这取决于内在的个性特征。 我知道我的三个兄弟认为我是外星人，公平地说，我没有目睹他们的出生，所以谁能说他们没有在卷心菜丛中覓食或被鹳掉下来，尽管我的父母尽了最大努力吓跑它？
Our perceptions are as unique as our fingerprints, and best known only to ourselves, right?
我们的感知和我们的指纹一样独特，只有我们自己最清楚，对吗？
Well…
嗯…
Self-perception is the awareness of our thoughts, behaviours, words and feelings in relation to the world around us. You might imagine that intimate knowledge of these would belong to the beholder. I mean, who else knows better when I’m feeling tired, or hungry, or entirely bereft of a verbal filter? I am, the one living in my body, after all.
自我感知是指對我們思想、行為、言語和感受與我們周圍世界的關係的認識。 你可能会想象，对这些的深入了解将属于观察者。 我的意思是，当我感到疲惫、饥饿或完全没有语言过滤器时，还有谁更清楚呢？ 毕竟，我就是，活在我身体里的人。
Yet, any parent can tell you that one of their chief functions is to act as sleep enforcer when their child is being a horror but is certainly not tired and will never, ever be….zzzzz (said child passes out). Same goes for hunger; ratty attitudes are best solved with a healthy calorific hug, as every parent comes to understand the hard way.
然而，任何父母都可以告诉你，当他们的孩子感到害怕时，他们的主要职能之一是充当睡眠执行者，但肯定不累，也永远不会……zzzzzz（孩子晕倒）。 饥饿也是如此；饥饿的态度最好通过健康的热量拥抱来解决，因为每个父母都会理解困难的方式。
Even at my advanced age, when one might reasonably expect to have mastered the art of self-awareness, a multitude of triggers and the horses they rode in on are unknown to me on a conscious level.
即使在我年事已高的时候，当人们可以合理地期望掌握自我意识的艺术时，我在意识层面上不知道众多触发器和它们骑的马匹。
I might recognise feeling deflated, devalued or defeated after a conversation, but it is only through my feelings that this awareness is manifest.
谈话后，我可能会意识到沮丧、贬低或失败的感觉，但只有通过我的感受，这种意识才会显现出来。
The reason for this response is beyond my conscious perception.
做出这种反应的原因超出了我的意识。
Daryl Bem first floated the theory of Self Perception in 1967, suggesting that when lacking an initial response or emotion to a particular stimulus, we observe our own reactions and behaviours and use these to divine our position.
达里尔·贝姆在1967年首次提出了自我感知理论，他建议当对特定刺激缺乏初始反应或情绪时，我们观察自己的反应和行为，并利用这些来占卜我们的立场。
For example, I don’t know what I think about AI, but by avoiding it wholeheartedly, I prove that I do not like, nor approve of it.
例如，我不知道我对人工智能有什么看法，但通过全心全意地回避它，我证明我不喜欢它，也不赞成它。
For many, a visit home to the childhood nest is a prime example of this disconnect in self-awareness; something that is especially prescient right now as a large proportion of Nanjing’s international community try to remember how to pack a suitcase, and when to arrive at check-in, and what is my DOB anyway, for the first time in almost 4 years.
对许多人来说，回家拜访童年的巢穴是这种自我意识脱节的一个典型例子；现在特别有先见之明，因为南京国际社会的很大一部分人试图记住如何打包行李箱，什么时候到办理登机手续，以及我的DOB是什么，这是近4年来第一次。
Going home can trigger behaviours or responses that do not manifest in other arenas of our adult lives. For some, it is a sense of safety, comfort, well-being. For others, defences rise, pre-emptive attacks are lined up and pathologies for self-care post the ordeal are already on the back-burner.
回家可能会引发在我们成年生活的其他领域中没有表现出来的行为或反应。 對一些人來說，這是一種安全感、舒適感和幸福感。 对其他人来说，防御措施增强，先发制人的攻击排成一排，磨难后自我护理的病理已经处于次要地位。
When I go to any house in Ireland, I immediately become parched for a cup of tea, which is a good thing, because about 30 seconds after setting foot inside, one is inevitably procured.
当我去爱尔兰的任何一家房子时，我立刻就会因为喝杯茶而感到干缄，这是件好事，因为在踏入里面大约30秒后，人们不可避免地被采购了。
Self-perception theory goes even further, to suggest that our behaviours can influence our thoughts and feelings, the sort of Fake it ‘Til You Make It of the Psych world.
自我感知理论更进一步，表明我们的行为可以影响我们的思想和感受，这就是心理学世界的假象。
In one experiment, Tiffany Ifo had one group of participants look at anonymous photos of men, but they had to do so whilst holding a pencil in their mouths, apparently inducing a smile. (I have tried this, and if I ever smile at you like that, run away. Very fast.) A second group looked at the same photos, sans pencil and creepy smile.
在一次实验中，Tiffany Ifo让一群参与者查看了男性的匿名照片，但他们不得不一边这样做，嘴里含着铅笔，显然会诱发微笑。 （我試過這個，如果我那樣對你微笑，就跑掉。 非常快。） 第二組人看著相同的照片，沒有鉛筆和令人毛骨悚然的微笑。
The act of smiling resulted in reduced rates of implicit bias towards Black men in this study. The behaviour changed attitudes.
在这项研究中，微笑的行为降低了对黑人男性的隐性偏见。 這種行為改變了態度。
Ample studies support this hypothesis, not only around reduced biases but also instilling positive responses to previously antagonistic beliefs.
大量研究支持这一假设，不仅围绕减少偏见，而且对以前的敌对信念产生积极反应。
So. Then. We can hack our own brains, you say? All I need to do to live a healthy life in mind and body is to live a healthy life in mind and body? Sounds like a Ponzi scheme, doesn’t it?
所以。 然后。 你说我们可以破解自己的大脑？ 为了在身心上过上健康的生活，我需要做的就是在身心上过上健康的生活？ 听起来像是庞氏骗局，不是吗？
But that’s the theory, and it seems to be sound. Behaviours first, understanding of attitudes and beliefs later.
但这就是理论，而且似乎很合理。 首先是行为，然后是理解态度和信念。
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy has endorsed this practice for decades; change the behaviour and the beliefs will follow.
几十年來，认知行為療法一直支援這種做法；改變行為和信念就會隨之而來。
Maybe there is some truth in that. My famine-mind mentality has led me to hoard like it was 2019. But every new box that arrives at our new house now inspires the insatiable desire to just bin it. And I have.
也许这其中有一些道理。 我的饥荒心态导致我像2019年一样囤积。 但现在每个到达我们新房子的新盒子都会激发人们对它的贪得无厌的渴望。 而且我有。
My house is still dallying on the obscene in terms of things; vast oceans of things. But there are less things, and every moment I get more confident in my ability to live without the small, medium, large and extra-large cast iron pans.
就事物而言，我的房子仍然在淫秽事物中游荡；浩瀚的事物海洋。 但有些东西更少了，每时每刻，我对自己没有小、中、大和超大铸铁平底锅的生活能力越来越有信心。
My perception of need vs. want has undergone such a metamorphosis, I can hardly remember the the mindset that said yes to the abundance of clutter.
我对需求与想要的感知经历了如此的蜕变，我几乎不记得对杂乱无章的慷慨表示同意的心态。
Honestly, I never thought I would see the day. And yet, here it is. Goodbye earthly shackles, maybe Diogenes had it right after all.
老实说，我从未想过我会看到这一天。 然而，它就在这里。 再见尘世的枷锁，也许第欧根尼毕竟是对的。
Soon we will fly, and refresh our perspectives, and miss those closest to our hearts, for they are our family now. Points of view can be shifted, but our passports, our photos, and our core beings remain the same, until they don’t. Life then, is like a game of “Never, Ever Have I Ever” until you do.
很快，我们将飞翔，刷新我们的视角，并想念那些最亲近我们的人，因为他们现在是我们的家人。 观点可以转移，但我们的护照、照片和核心存在保持不变，直到它们不改变。 那么，生活就像一场“从来没有，我曾经有过”的游戏，直到你这样做。
Isn’t that liberating?
那不是解放吗？
